A week on Depakote feeling really low, very sad. New blog post #bipolar

I’ve been on the lowest dose of Depakote for a week. I’m supposed to up my dose today. I’m not okay. I’m struggling with my low mood. I’m so damn tired of feeling this way. If I had a crystal ball that told me I would always feel this way and nothing was going to help I would tap out. I hate feeling like this.

Spending time with people sometimes helps in the moment but not always. Yesterday I had a long day with people and I found myself sinking into sadness randomly throughout the day. I would just feel overwhelmed by it.

We are on school vacation and have the next week off. I hate vacations. I can’t handle all this time. Although lately I can’t handle work anymore either. I feel overwhelmed by every little bit of stress at work. I used to feel like I could handle stress pretty well. Now I feel like it knocks me flat.

I finally slept well last night for the first time all week. I’ve been waking up at three in the morning and struggling to fall back asleep.

Sometimes I wonder of all these medications have made me worse rather than better. I don’t remember having such bad anxiety before I was on medications. What would happen if I slowly tapered off everything. I can’t feel worse than to do right now. I know the medications are not helping me.


4 thoughts on “A week on Depakote feeling really low, very sad. New blog post #bipolar

  1. I don’t think they are helping me. I know I am feeling as bad as my lowest point. What is the point of all the damn side effects just to feel like crap.

  2. It is hard upping or lowering drugs. You just need to power through it. Yes, this is coming from a person who has made the choice to go without meds, but they really helped me get through some of the darkest points in my life. Good luck!

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